Thursday, November 30, 2017

Am I a Robot Now?? Wondering Why Books Don't Make Me Sad Anymore





I was getting started on my BEST OF 2017 List, looking through all the books I've read this year when a thought occurred to me: I haven't cried while reading a book in a long, long time.  Like since January.

This is weird for me because I usually read a lot of emotional books, and I tend to think I feel things deeply-- but for whatever reason, I haven't been feeling the feels lately.

I went to my "Read List" on Goodreads to see if maybe my reading habits had changed and I read all happy books in 2017, but I soon realized that was not the case.

I read We Now Return to Regular Life by Martin Wilson, This is How it Happened by Paula Stokes, Conviction by Kelly Loy Gilbert, After the Fall by Kate Hart... and nothing.


So am I a robot??





This whole inner debate really started when I read If I Stay by Gayle Forman a few years ago-- and nothing.  It was a REALLY devastatingly sad book, but my eyes remained dry.  Since then I think it's been harder and harder for me to tap that SUPER emotional place inside myself while reading.  The books that have made me cry were books that I personally related to in some way.  Books that made me feel less alone in the world, or books that held a mirror up to behaviors and/or things about myself that I don't particularly like.

Ick, I sound so self-centered.  I should really be able to do a good empathy cry.


Here are the books that have made me cry in the last few years:






Not a super impressively long list.




Let's Talk:
I think I'm in need of a good therapeutic cry and I need your recs.  What's the most recent book that broke your feelings??



26 comments:

  1. I think you hit the nail on the head when you said that you're more likely to cry when you can personally relate to the book. Some books that probably should have made me cry actually didn't, but I do cry often enough while reading. One book that always makes me cry is Henry's Sisters by Cathy Lamb, and earlier this year I read Three Amazing Things About You by Jill Mansell, and my notes on the book literally say "tearjerker."

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    1. I hate to say it, but I kind of like when a book makes me cry. It's an emotional release and I always end up feeling stronger about the book than if I just felt regular sad. I feel like everyone cried in If I Stay and I was just like ☹️. It's hard to pin point what will be the thing to "get" me.

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  2. I don't really cry a lot at books anymore either, but I don't really know why that is. I know I teared up some at The Lovely Bones, especially at the end. Heartbreaking. But books that people hard core cried over and I didn't would be Me Before You and The Fault in Our Stars (I think I cried for both - or at least Me Before You - when seeing the movie.)

    -Lauren
    www.shootingstarsmag.net

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    1. Maybe we don't cry as much because we read so much??? Maybe it's all starting to blend together or something??? I don't know. The Lovely Bones TOTALLY got me, but I read that many years ago. TFIOS I defintiely cried over too. But John Green always makes me cry. Maybe I need to read a John Green book!!!!

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  3. I think I cry less at books lately. I also think it is specific things that make me cry. I agree it is usually something personal to me that triggers the tears. I have to go look and see when the last book that made me cry was but I tear up a lot , just not full out cry.

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    1. Same-- I probably tear up at times, but the tears just aren't happening. Not that I want to be THAT emotional all the time, but I love it when I connect super deeply to a book that it hurts my heart.

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  4. I agree that I'm more likely to cry if the book is relatable. I used to NEVER cry in movies or books everrrrrr but for some reason in the past two years I've become a giant mush who gets teary-eyed over the silliest exchanges. I'm having the opposite problem that you are!

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    1. That's too funny. I feel like I went through a phase when I cried at sad commercials-- but now I'm all roboty.

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  5. I wish I was more like you TBH, I cry so much over books and fictional characters 😂

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  6. I cried reading Empire of Storms. It's not a sad book at all. There was just one moment that really got to me and before I knew it, I was in tears. The last actual sad book that I read was Salt to Sea and I cried a few times reading it.

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    1. Hmmm Salt to Sea does sound really good. I'll have to put that on my NEED TO CRY List.

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  7. I can't remember the last time I cried reading a book, but then, it's been more and more difficult for me lately to really like a character :( I'm not even sure I have to relate to them, I just have to LIKE them, but I think the trend of snarky, sarcastic protagonists has really put me off. I feel like one of the few people in the world who DOESN'T like snark.

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    1. I feel like the snarkiness that I DO like is hard to come by. You're so right that it's super overdone to the point where it's not unique at all. I think I have to like or relate to the character to have an emotional response to their plight.

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  8. It's ok, I'm a robot too lol. I've never really been a book crier. Like, on occasion I've shed a few tears, but I don't think I've ever fully cried over a book. And it probably also has to do with the fact that we read SO MUCH that we do get more used to it. It also depends on the book. Just because something sad happens, I won't truly get emotional unless it's written in a way that really puts me in the shoes of a character who's feeling the emotion and makes me feel it too.

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    1. Robot Girls UNITE!!! LOL. I'm starting to think you're right-- the reason I don't cry as much as I used to is the fact that I'm reading so much more and it's all YA and a lot of it the same, so I am used to it. I need something to totally blow me away to get into my hard heart.

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  9. Hi Michelle!
    Like you I love reading emotional books, especially teen dramas and if they are deep and heartbreaking the better. But sometimes they lack deepness and fail to cause us a reaction.
    About some super sad books recs, I read A monster calls a few months ago and it was devastating. And I cry a lot when I read Wintergirls by Laurie Halse Anderson.
    Hope you find a therapeutic cry soon, but if you don't what can you do... is not that bad to be a robot.

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    1. It's not bad to be a robot!! I love that!! Laurie Halse Anderson has gotten me SO MANY TIMES!!! I cried when reading SPEAK, WINTERGIRLS, TWISTED, and CATALYST. Maybe THE IMPOSSIBLE KNIFE OF MEMORY should be my next read????

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  10. I've honestly never cried while reading a book or watching a movie, so if you're a robot then so am I! I don't think you should beat yourself up over it!

    Tracy @ Cornerfolds

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    1. Robot Girls UNITE!!! hahahaha. I feel like I used to be that super emotional reader girl, but now it's just so hard :(

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  11. I cry all the time. I cry because the book made me happy, and I cry because it was so painful. I think I save all my emotions for when I am reading, and I am glad to see I wasn't the only one who shed tears over Before I Fall.

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    1. BEFORE I FALL 😭😭😭 I miss being that emotional. I don't know if my personality has changed or I just am not connecting with the books in the same way??? I feel like there was a time in my life where I would cry at commercials-- and now I'm just metal wires and bolts :(

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  12. I agree, it HAS been harder to make me cry lately too, it seems! Like I just read a book where a kind of important character died and I was like "oh cool". Nothing, zero feels. And it wasn't the book, I think it was me! But to help, here are some books that DID make me cry: The Serpent King (holy tears) and Goodbye Days, Paper Butterflies (literally sobbed so hard I almost threw up) ummm I did shed some tears for You'll Miss Me When I'm Gone (which was just all around awesome regardless of tears hah). It's been a pretty dry year for my eyes, too! What even!?

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  13. I don't really cry while reading. I'm trying to think of books that I've read recently that made me cry, but nothing is coming to mind. I read Second Chance Summer by Morgan Matson several years ago and that made me cry so hard!

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  14. This is such a funny (sorry!) topic. I find that books get me teared up less than movies do. And sometimes when I know a book is trying to make me cry, I just resist all the more!
    Jen Ryland Reviews

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  15. I've been feeling similarly this year. I'm not sure if I'm just finding it hard to connect with books as much as I did, or if it's my choices in reading. The last book to make me WEEP was They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera, which is one of my favourite books of this year, and might be one of my favourites of all time. I already want to re-read it, even whilst knowing it will make me cry so much again. But yeah, I read that back in August, so there hasn't been a lot of books to give me a lot of feels lately.

    I hope you find a book to make you cry soon (I mean this in the nicest way possible!)

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